I am not sure about advise but here is what we have going on...
My daughter is 2.5 and still nurses although there is not much. Her fever was 103 yesterday and thank goodness nursing soothed her. She is much better today. We are in the midst of moving. I think if I drank more water there would be more. We are having a filtered water issue. I think nursing will support the moving process although it will slow it down. I am hoping to go until at least she is 3 when she is in school for a few months.
As far as sleep goes, a few months ago when I realized I needed more sleep to function and keep up with the changes (single mom trying to make the best choices) happening in our lives, I decided to make a "no nursing in bed/bedroom" rule. She nurses in the morning, before and after naps, and in the evening. Sometimes other times during the day.
Truthfully, personally, if I was in pain I am not sure I would continue. I suggest you go with what feels right for you! I really hope this helps!!

If you are not producing milk, then, guess what - she is already weaned.

If you want to continue to snuggle her and co-sleep, you can do that without nursing. Believe it or not, she will transition in a few nights from "snuggling with nursing" to "snuggling." You just have to replace the attention that she gets with nursing with some other type of reassuring, comforting activity. Like back rubs or head holding or whatever else soothes your child. My son preferred to go to sleep with his forehead pressed against my palm. My daughter wants her back rubbed. Each one is different.

When it is time for bed, create a new ritual and use it consistently. For example, bath, stories, backrub. When we weaned, I told my kids that I would "lay down with them for a minute," and I rubbed their backs, but did not go to sleep with them. I would stand up when they were almost, but not quite, asleep. This caused lots of anguish, but, after about a week, it was over. And I was there when they woke up in the night. So I would just rub their backs without talking until they settled down again and went back to sleep.

If she settles easily with your husband, you may also want to wear one of his tshirts to distract her from the smell of breast milk.

Unfortunately, it may not be easy, but it will end eventually. Everything does.

Good luck,
kari

Thank you both for great advise. I will try using my husbands shirt tonight and try the back rub. It is so reassuring that other mamas go through the same thing!
Love and light,
Maggie

i agree if there is barely any milk she is pretty much weaned from breastfeeding. and now she can be weaned from your breasts, because probably what she really wants is you. when my daughter was 2 1/2 she started getting really weird (that's not the right word but i can't think of it) about nursing- she would want to nurse every 1/2 hour or so, but then only go for 20 seconds on one side, then want to switch, and on and on, and it finally got to the point where i said, "this is ridiculous," and realized it wasn't the nourishment she was wanting but just the comfort and the cuddle time and was using breastfeeding as her comfort mechanism. so, this may seem cruel, but i put hot sauce on my nipples. not really hot sauce, just tapatio or something. and she cried, and said "booba SPICY!" and that was her instant weaning, because she never tried again to nurse. she thought about it a few times, and remembered, and stopped herself. and after that, it was so much better, because i wasn't frustrated, and (this is the important part) she wasn't frustrated either. it was like she was clinging to her babyhood, and she gave herself permission to grow up a bit. she switched her comfort mechanism to sucking her two fingers, we cuddled and snuggled and slept together just as much and possibly even more than before.

so what i can advise is to go with your gut feeling. there's no point in prolonging a situation that's driving you both crazy. i know breastfeeding is so special, but what's really special is the bond and the love between you and your daughter, and that's not going to go anywhere. allow the next chapter of your lives to open, it may be ready and waiting.

many blessings,
maria