not much time to post here, but let me say I really do feel for you. this kind of behavior start with the internet, but it sure has made it convenient for people who want attention outside their committed relationships to look around for it. you rather have to decide for yourself whether you want to live with it or move on - the old Dear Abby question ("are you better off with him or without him?"). the world is SO full of temptations! is yur husbadn at all amenable to counseling or mediation? is he jsut a guy who gets "borted" and wants a casual envounter, or the promsie of one, o ...there are a lot of questions to resolve.

i'm so sorry, hon, that you're having to go through this. it is my opinion that the rules for cheating vary; if you wouldn't do it if your partner were there, it's cheating (unless, of course, for very "open" relationships when both people know what's going on, but don't want to "know" what's going on..). this man is your husband, so i'm assuming you have unprotected sex with him at least some of the time (maybe i'm wrong), and i think that's an important thing to consider when dealing with someone who is opening the door to infidelity. for me it is.

please consider relationship counseling, and best wishes.

That is horrible behavior on his part. It's probably best to go find a good family counselor *just for you* (at least initially) to help you know how to best deal with the situation. Someone you can go over with in detail what your husband is like as a person... some filandering men are capable of changing but IMO most don't. And I wouldn't take him at his word that he hasn't cheated on you... that it was just 'cyber-cheating' as he says.

Since making a clean break is impossible when you have kids together, it's very hard to make a decision. Sorry this happened to you =(